# Showerthoughts

Stupid app ideas #3525: The passive aggressive wake up call.

Ok, daily struggle: the alarm clock goes off, hit snooze, doze off again till the alarm clock goes off, hit snooze,… rince and repeat.

Can’t we make an alarm clock app that just stares at me angrily till I get up?

Isn’t it lovely, how social media always markets itself as the spearhead of free speech, while at the same time giving users voting tools to bury anything that’s not echoing the popular opinion of the platform in question?

Blockchain is not the answer. It is the question and the answer is always: NO!

Come on, it is a no brainer. Even if there was a meaningful application for the technology, it would always mean legitimizing a giant waste of resources/environmental pollution and accepting crypto scams as the cost of operation.

I just had a horrible business idea:

1. Create a shitty, low effort Android app (dunno, something like a weather widget, horoscope, or calculator knock off).
2. Publish on Play, let it rot ripen for a couple of months, then buy 100k+ installs (see email spam folder for offers), add some 5* reviews for good measure.
3. Sell that app to those asshats that keep spamming me about buying my apps for a song.

Yes, those scavengers DO annoy me. Especially when having a disclaimer in their footer, informing me that I received their offer because I subscribed to some mailing list.

Dear Santa, this year, I wish for world peace and a pony Facebook and Twitter to shut down.

What if… social media is actually Santa’s naughty list these days?

Ah, Thanksgiving Day. Have you ever wondered what it would look like in an alternate reality in which turkeys, not humans, evolved to be the dominant species of planet earth?

So, the revelation of the week is that Facebook curates the newsfeed to confront users with as much hate as possible, as this makes them stay on the platform longer and increases ad revenue. Surprise! From this, the conclusion arises that the company is threatening democracy, which is a totally bad thing, we should all be pissed about.

Don’t know about you guys, but my conclusion would have been that, I, as a Facebook user, despite all warnings from privacy advocates and against all reason, disclosed way too much personal information about myself, thus enabling the data kraken to waste huge quantities of my life by triggering me with upsetting things, I can’t won’t do anything about anyway.

Ah Halloween… the day on which you make your house look scary in order to attract children begging for candy.

Protip: put more effort into decorating and eat the candy yourself.

I keep wondering why people think it would be a good idea to break up Facebook. A breakup is an action taken by a cartel office to (re)establish competition. A lack of competition isn’t the problem, the whole business model is!